Dear Conflicted Parent

Dear conflicted parent,

It is alright to not have all the right answers.

We live in a politically correct society. Everyone can spot the beam out instantly in the eyes of another but take decades to take out that which is in theirs. I make a great deal of sacrifice for my children. Their well-being is tremendously important, and there are moments where I do question if the me I once knew prior to my pair of thirties still lingers though not always in view. Sometimes you see the screaming toddler in the third isle of the supermarket and think oh my, can’t she control her child? But having been there, having experienced the child that wails at the mere sound of no, I get it! But, not because I have been there means I don’t try to help my wild child work through his moods. Some days I’ll be the new age mom and google until I am blue in the face. Other days I’ll blow my sister’s phone off the hook, as she has two of her own and boy she is like my Ghandi /fairy God-mother! All in all though nothing beats a moment of silence and a quick prayer. It helps me snap back to one!

It is alright to be afraid.

Being a parent doesn’t come with skills developed overnight! It takes time, but there must be a willingness to listen to advice, try different methods, “tek yuh han tun fashion” as they say in Jamaica. It is normal to be daunted by the fact that you literally have the life of another human being in your hands. God chose you, have faith in him and do your part, things will work out.

Isaiah 41:10

Fear thou not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness.

It is alright to be tired and overwhelmed.

Remember that is a whole new life that you birthed and are raising to be placed into this crazy, fast paced world. Yes, you’ll want to do it all the right way. Yes you’ll want to raise them to be normal, well adjusted children. But do not allow society to completely break down your personal thoughts and input. People like to see a well behaved child in public but often not know all that goes into it, the time, the patience, the tears, the sacrifice. It is okay to want some time to yourself. It is okay to want some relaxation, free your mind and the rest will follow.

It is alright to be a work in progress.

Life comes at you fast. Whether you have a pair of thirties like I do or not, life can be an all day everyday learning experience. We are all works in progress. We can all learn from each other. Us moms gotta stick together!

 

From my pair of thirties and I, see you soon.

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